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| Name | G | AB | R | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | TB | BB | K | SB | CS | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WAR |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Faye Tafo-Felia CF | 108 | 460 | 55 | 136 | 6 | 0 | 18 | 83 | 196 | 30 | 83 | 1 | 0 | .296 | .337 | .426 | .763 | 2.2 |
| Michael Honcho RF | 108 | 450 | 80 | 136 | 8 | 1 | 22 | 74 | 212 | 65 | 62 | 59 | 19 | .302 | .390 | .471 | .861 | 3.5 |
| Man Of Steal 3B | 108 | 445 | 68 | 117 | 11 | 1 | 12 | 47 | 166 | 64 | 78 | 48 | 18 | .263 | .357 | .373 | .730 | 2.0 |
| Willy Whacker DH | 108 | 436 | 66 | 113 | 12 | 2 | 20 | 61 | 189 | 51 | 85 | 0 | 1 | .259 | .337 | .433 | .770 | 0.7 |
| Rice Shower SS | 108 | 404 | 50 | 120 | 20 | 0 | 3 | 42 | 149 | 34 | 55 | 0 | 2 | .297 | .350 | .369 | .719 | 2.5 |
| Enrique von Muy Caliente 2B | 108 | 404 | 53 | 101 | 6 | 1 | 11 | 53 | 142 | 63 | 68 | 0 | 0 | .250 | .351 | .351 | .703 | 2.7 |
| Tobias Graf C | 108 | 394 | 55 | 115 | 11 | 3 | 6 | 38 | 150 | 50 | 65 | 0 | 0 | .292 | .371 | .381 | .752 | 2.5 |
| Jaheem Butler LF | 102 | 387 | 39 | 105 | 17 | 2 | 6 | 51 | 144 | 33 | 66 | 0 | 1 | .271 | .332 | .372 | .704 | 0.1 |
| Finn Lincoln 1B | 108 | 379 | 56 | 92 | 9 | 2 | 9 | 53 | 132 | 47 | 62 | 0 | 1 | .243 | .331 | .348 | .679 | -0.0 |
| Tommy Killfigure RF | 17 | 33 | 7 | 13 | 4 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 20 | 4 | 4 | 0 | 3 | .394 | .459 | .606 | 1.066 | 0.5 |
| Brian Taylor 1B | 13 | 13 | 1 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 3 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 0 | 0 | .385 | .429 | .615 | 1.044 | 0.2 |
