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| Name | G | AB | R | H | 2B | 3B | HR | RBI | TB | BB | K | SB | CS | AVG | OBP | SLG | OPS | WAR |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Bass Reeves 2B | 47 | 200 | 51 | 63 | 12 | 1 | 9 | 34 | 104 | 25 | 42 | 39 | 6 | .315 | .386 | .520 | .906 | 2.9 |
| Smalls LF | 47 | 195 | 22 | 52 | 17 | 0 | 10 | 36 | 99 | 12 | 52 | 0 | 0 | .267 | .306 | .508 | .814 | 0.6 |
| Lawn Gnomes RF | 47 | 192 | 41 | 71 | 25 | 2 | 8 | 43 | 124 | 22 | 50 | 0 | 0 | .370 | .433 | .646 | 1.078 | 2.4 |
| Daniel Plainview C | 47 | 191 | 39 | 57 | 17 | 1 | 6 | 42 | 94 | 26 | 44 | 0 | 1 | .298 | .377 | .492 | .869 | 2.1 |
| Xicoyotl Montalbán 3B | 47 | 180 | 32 | 48 | 8 | 4 | 6 | 29 | 82 | 20 | 50 | 16 | 6 | .267 | .340 | .456 | .795 | 1.1 |
| Ted Giannoulas 1B | 47 | 179 | 35 | 50 | 11 | 1 | 10 | 37 | 93 | 32 | 52 | 0 | 0 | .279 | .390 | .520 | .909 | 1.5 |
| Melo Misteur CF | 47 | 173 | 32 | 41 | 5 | 0 | 5 | 28 | 61 | 13 | 58 | 1 | 0 | .237 | .287 | .353 | .640 | 0.3 |
| Literal Flamingo SS | 47 | 170 | 25 | 41 | 20 | 1 | 0 | 16 | 63 | 22 | 42 | 0 | 0 | .241 | .325 | .371 | .695 | 0.4 |
| Chazz Lamborghini DH | 47 | 168 | 28 | 40 | 8 | 0 | 9 | 29 | 75 | 29 | 46 | 0 | 0 | .238 | .348 | .446 | .795 | 0.5 |
